yes, but my friends call me ACHIE

It's 2:20 in the morning and, surprise surprise, i can't fall asleep. Instead i'm trying to convince myself that the essay i just wrote, which is probably the third worst piece of writing i've ever pumped out, won't make me look like a complete asshole. I say third worst as an educated guess, leaving room for anything written in a foreign language, and/or a particularly horrible first draft of an uninspiring college essay. Somehow, this assignment was so demoralizing, that i needed to go back into my saved documents, and read things that i've written before to remind me that at one point in time, i knew what i was saying. I think i may have chosen the wrong classes. It's that, or the hazy mess of my exhausted mind has left me feeling uninspired. Either way, at this point in time, i feel like i'm going no where. Maybe i need to drink more water. I spent a riveting 4 hours yesterday standing in the sun with another 100,000 people, pretending like i really care about football and like the color yellow. That, followed by a lack of sleep, and a night of vodka and dancing probably didn't help with the dehydration. Plus my lululemon bag told me that apparently water's good for you. You never know when advertising will give you those precious nuggets of golden wisdom. Thanks lulu. I tried to take the RACHIE off my wall, because i thought that removing it might help me sleep. Sometimes, when i'm lying in my perfectly comfortable bed, about to drift into slumber, i can hear the supple whisper of "raaaachhhiieeee" echo through my brain. Yes, it is as unsettling as it sounds. Anyways, i started with R, since that seemed a grammatically perfect place to start, but it seems my super durable double-sided tape as just as durable as it claims to be. Instead of a clean strip, there was still the pathetic remains of the letter left lingering on my wall, like mayan ruins after thousands of years of weathering. That simply wouldn't do. Now here i was holding a partially decorated R in my hands and staring at an equally disturbing ACHIE. I gave up, and decided that instead of rearranging my interior decoration, i should just rearrange my identity. That might be easier.